A Little Introspection

     I have a few things I'm trying to work through currently.  I know I have come so much further than I was before.  I am still having a challenge with certain aspects of healthy living.  At the foundation of my health/fitness journey, I feel like I am struggling with my "why." Meaning why it is important to me, and why I keep going. I am not yet at a point where I just love working out. It still hasn't clicked for me on a consistent basis.
     I completed the 12 week transformation challenge and did well, and feel like there are some great habits that I'm continuing to build on. I enjoy the DDP Yoga DVDs that I'm doing, yet in order to get further results I feel I will need to do more. Where I struggle is that it seems the fit body & healthy me hasn't been enough to motivate and excite me to do what I need to do each day.
     My husband and I were talking about it at length today, and I realized that one of the few time periods in my life that I didn't feel out of place in the gym was when I was doing karate. I was motivated at the gym because anything I was doing was helping to strengthen me for my karate classes. Our tight budget, which hopefully will ease up soon, was the main reason for dropping karate (I also paused when I had Chickpea, who is 11 months now). 

 
      Another piece of the puzzle is that in general I feel like the active, fit person who loves to workout is still aspirational for me currently. In a way, anytime I go to the gym, I feel out of place. It's almost like I feel as though I'm pretending. I can have a workout plan and everything written down to follow, and while doing it at the gym I feel awkward. I have only been working out from home since Chickpea was born, and I know that if I got someone to watch him so that I could go to the gym I would have to face that awkwardness.
     All these thoughts have me asking questions of others that are also working on their fitness journey.  The questions I asked them are:  Is it possible that the love of working out will never click, and it is something that I will always be forcing myself to do? When did it click for you? Did you have to find a passion?
      At the end of it all, I really do want to find a way to just enjoy working out. I want it to be a part of who I am. I currently feel like I'm a little kid playing dress up. It's something I'm playing at, but in reality it is not me. I want to be consistent, because I know that when I have fallen off course it really dings my self-confidence.
     I will continue to explore this, and plan to write more about it after getting feedback from others on it.  If you have feedback or thoughts you'd like to share on this topic, I'd love to hear it!

All the best,
OkieGal

The Year of Following Through

     So I've been out of my normal routine.  A week before Christmas, Chickpea, my hubby, and I all got sick.  Then you put the holidays on top of that, and you have a recipe for some temptation and falling behind.  Well, here I am, owning it and getting back in the groove.  The last few days I have completed my workouts, and after hubby gets back from the grocery store this evening we will have better food choices (aside from the pizza I ordered).
     As I've been thinking about what I want to focus on for 2015, I've settled on following through.  This is not just for my health, it is also in other areas of my life.  Health and fitness is a great example though.  I often get excited and it is not uncommon for me to make it 3-6 months doing well.  Then something will throw me off.  In the past I have lost focus and left the path that I originally set out to follow.  If I didn't see the results I wanted right away, I would get discouraged.
     Another aspect of my life that I will follow through on is cleaning and organizing my home.  I ran across a plan for decluttering and organizing the home in 52 weeks.  Each week has a different area to focus on, and there are 15 minute missions to accomplish each day to help you reach that week's goal.  The Facebook group is called Declutter 365, and the full details about the program can be found at Home-Storage-Solutions-101.com.  It's amazing how just taking little actions toward the goal can help give more motivation.  Today I went through my 2 drawers of kitchen utensils.  I tossed those that were damaged, put duplicates in the donation bin, and organized what we are keeping.  It looks so much better!  The goal is to follow through during the year.  It's easy to be excited now.  The true test will be how I follow through as the year progresses. 

     My 2015 is about following through, and understanding that it is not about an end goal.  Instead, it is about the process of continually moving forward towards the outcomes and milestones I desire.  I will continue to update on health/fitness related progress.  I also will be incorporating posts about other projects that I am focusing on as well. 
     I'd love to hear about your focus for the year! 

All the best,
OkieGal